Connecting Couples in Addiction: Episode 7- Self-Care

Episode 7: Self-Care

Show Notes

 

First 5 minutes:

Intro- If we are going to consider healthy self-care, we need to consider something that engages our physical body and something that challenges our mind.

 

We’re discussing the nuts and bolts of recovery and how we get traction in our health and sobriety. This episode is all about self-care. Angela starts with her thoughts on self-care from her experience. During a time when she was trying to get healthy her sponsor asked her, are you eating healthy and sleeping well? As simple as those questions are, being a healthy human at its most basic level, is fueling and resting.

 

Another one is, am I exercising? What is self-care for Angela? Being able to disconnect from technology and to slow down and remove ourselves from work and stress is a start for good self-care.

 

Minutes 5-10:

What does it look like to take a little time for yourself? We often think we have to take care of everyone else first and also that we have to be productive. And self-care doesn’t have tangible measures. It doesn’t feel production. Angela overheard a quote about how intimacy is built around wasting time, and we don’t build into our schedules, wasted time.

 

We are not good at self-care. It is way easier to go to the other things. These 5 action steps build on each other. We have to remove access to things. We have to have awareness. And now we are adding to those two, we have to consider what it is like to tend to ourselves. We have to self-care. When we are unhealthy, we waste time and money. But then when we try to get healthy, somehow we lose track of the fact that some ‘wasted time’ is actually good for us.

 

Minutes 10-15:

What is my body asking for? What would feed my longing and give me a sense of relief. Chad likes bike riding. It is good for his soul. Can we have an awareness of what adds to our life and what brings us joy? There isn’t a self-care plan that is general and applies to everyone. It has to be specific and be something that you enjoy.

 

Angela shares story of her sponsor knowing her well enough to encourage her to do laundry and go for a run because those things are good self-care for her.

 

Minutes 15-20:

There are a few inherent ideas for self-care. Some form of physical activity is good for everyone. Getting your body involved is good everyone. Studies support this. Feeding your mind is another good option. Challenging your mind to learn something new. Ask yourself, “What can do that is fun, active and also challenges my mind?”

 

Some of the things that are not great to ‘do’, watching too much tv or playing video games. Try not to go to fantasy as self-care. Fantasy and escape doesn’t challenge your mind or your body.

 

Minutes 20-25:

It’s worth it to consider asking what you reward yourself with. If you use some of your vices as ways to celebrate, and you remove them, you can also lose celebration if you haven’t figured about another thing that is good for you in the place of the bad. Am I adding something? And then how do I give myself permission to self-care. You have to be aware of what is good for you.

 

Connect Point:

Ask yourself, what is one thing you can add to your life or do that you enjoy, that would have a healthy side effect for you, your family or those around you. First check in with yourself, then see if you can share it with your partner.

 

For more information about The Real Imhoffs, check out their website at: www.therealimhoffs.com